A lady asked me recently: ‘How can I be a leader? I am not the boss’. I asked her if she had a family, and she nodded. I suggested that she could start honing her leadership skills at home by being a fine leader to her children.

I personally am concerned by the lack of leadership in a lot of ‘modern’ parenting. Who will model the way for our children if we don’t? That’s a parent’s job. And one of the areas where I feel parents can provide their children with invaluable leadership lies in the domain of material possessions. Over the past few years I have been involved in a number of volunteer projects where I helped people who had lost control of their personal environments. And it became clear to me how little sense of responsibility mmany of us have for possessions, especially when we’re out shopping! Just think about it for a moment. Every time you make a purchase, you’re not just purchasing something you want to use in some way. You are taking something into your home, into your life, that you will have to care for in some way. If it’s ready-prepared fast food, you will at least need to dispose of the rubbish. But with most purchases, there’s much more. You’ll have to process the product in some way (most food), or maintain it – clean it, mend it (clothes, furniture), store it, renovate it, move it, fill it, empty it, recycle it, etc etc etc. This takes time, lots of time.

I was discussing this issue at a lunch debate recently, and one man said: ‘When I want to get control of the stuff in my house, I just move it into my cellar. (Wait for the really good bit:) He continued: ‘I hope I don’t have to move house before I die, I don’t want to confront all the stuff down there!’ Who does he think should do that?

I think we can show considerable leadership in setting an example of respecting possessions and their value, and not wildly spending on all sorts of stuff in which we can easily drown. Sensible spending on possessions can solve many problems: credit card debt, overloaded homes, lack of time, and more. So if you want to work on your leadership skills at home, model the way for your family by working sensibly with your possessions, and teaching them to do the same. Discuss your children’s shopping choices with them, and look at your own. Leadership is not just for the big bosses.